Empire Minute 44: Failing Upwards

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March 13th, 2014


The runt-size robot is spit out of the water, makes a graceful arc, and comes crashing down into a patch of soft gray moss.


Dan McCoy and Elliott Kalan



  • Starts with R2-D2 getting swallowed by hump monster or space-Nessie; ends with Luke tending to R2 after he's been spat out.


  • Luke doesn't show much care or concern for R2 and immediately turns the discussion back to being about him.
  • Luke starts to realize that R2 may have been right about Dagobah.
  • R2 makes very forlorn robot noises.
  • Luke's lines are changed in the Special Edition. Other Special Edition changes are discussed.
  • Referenced: Fast Times at Ridgemont High.
  • How much does R2-D2 weigh? Same as a beer keg, but more if he's filled with mud.
  • R2-D2 as a handy drink cooler / esky.
  • Luke having Dianoga and trash compactor flashbacks.
  • R2-D2 turning random things off on The Death Star while trying to shut-down the trash compactors.
  • We never see the Star Wars swamp monsters in full. How this would have been handled in the Prequels.
  • Luke clumsily unholsters his blaster.
  • Recycled sound effects from the Holiday Special are used - specifically Chewie's father. Other Holiday Special elements that could have been used in the background.
  • Yoda's Jedi school and how it operates.
  • Luke should have closed the hatch on his X-wing - because of all the bugs.
  • Luke is a great pilot of only one type of vehicle; the Landspeeder. He crashes everything else.
  • Luke as the privileged child of the Rebellion.
  • Is R2-D2 getting spat out by the swamp creature too jokey and corny? (The hosts say no - it works in this sequence.)
  • Jar-Jar Binks is the senator that promotes Palpatine to the role of Emperor.
  • A movie about Jar Jar always failing upwards.

Meta Minute

  • 16:52 podcast episode length.
  • Cold-open: Ad-read - audible.com.
  • The "Hump Monster" that swallows R2 is a Dragonsnake


  • Pete: Space-Nessie. Alex: Spessie!
  • Elliott and Dan: <Dueling Woody Allen impersonations.>
  • Alex: Many Bothans died to bring us that apple.



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