Last Jedi Minute 71: Spiral Staircases

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May 10th, 2021


Guest commentator Steele Saunders arrives just in time to watch BB-8 & DJ help Rose & Finn evade the Canto Bight police!


Steele Saunders



  • Starts with the Canto Bight Mounted Police spotting Finn and Rose and announcing that "There they are", and ends with water rippling across the Jedi mosaic on Ahch-to.


  • Steele doesn't listen to the episodes of STAR WARS MINUTE that he guests on.
  • So far, none of the guests have surprised us with their hatred of this movie; people have been generally positive.
    • To quote Pete, "Civility is something we've come to expect from our stable of guests."
  • We like the spiral staircase that comes down from the spaceship.
    • Spiral staircases have always been captivating to Steele, at least the aesthetic.
      • In real life, anything circular is not as fun as it looks. See also: carnival rides.
    • If there's one thing we can all,appreciate: it's a good loading ramp on a spaceship in Star Wars.
      • It's fun to see the hydraulics and pistons working. At least when it's mechanical rather than magical.
      • Star Wars is best when it is grounded in the possible. See also: the scene from "The Mandalorian" where we see the inside of Slave I and how it and the seats rotate.
  • The "incredible cross section" of the Millennium Falcon and the unused storage room right next to the giant engine.
    • Realistic depictions of Jerry Seinfeld's apartment and the physical impossibility of the layout.
      • Seinfeld won't let his face be merchandized.
        • Jim Davis and Garfield merch. The urban legend of of the stick-on Garfield saving someones life.
  • CBMP outfits/uniforms would be very annoying to wear.
  • DJ does not blast the cops out of the sky. How would this movie be different if he had?
    • It seems like it's misleading you into thinking that he's really a good guy after all.
  • DJ is a good bite-sized Star Wars character in that he has limited screen time and only one movie, but he works while he's a part of it (that is, unless he comes back with spider legs later).
    • DJ versus Benicio del Toro versus BdT as DJ.
    • Do we have issues with any of the above, or is it just that he surrounded by wackiness (a la Star Wars rebels).
  • As we're going through this movie minute by minutes, we find that even the parts that don't really work don't linger as much as we thought they did when we saw it in the theater.
  • At first, Canto Bight feels like the AOTC droid Factory but it's not as repetitive and actually adds to the story: they get nowhere, but that's actually the whole point.
  • The article on that is in praise of DJ having a stutter for breaking stereotypes. Mentioned: the "Endor Apocalypse" scenario.
  • When Steele saw the fathiers in the trailer, they seemed to him to fit right in with dewbacks and rontos as a part of Star Wars.
  • We forgot what happened to BB-8 since he was last with DJ. It's foreshadowing of when BB-8 shows up to save them later.
  • Steele has a shelf of stuff that he loves that he's collected, but he also has another shelf that is his Hall of Shame which is his least favorite Star Wars things so he can take ownership of his dislike for them.
  • The ship design is reminiscent of the "Buck Rogers" TV show. OR if you got a box of sugar cones, the container inside that held them looked a little bit like the fighters from "Buck Rogers", at least to 5-year-old Pete. kind of.
  • Ahch-To: why does Luke choose to reconnect to the Force now? Mentioned: MySpace.
    • The last conversation Luke and Rey had was Luke explaining his side of the story on the destruction of the temple, and Rey stating that he didn't fail Kylo, Kylo failed him. Maybe that really stuck with him. Referenced: the chronological order re-cut of Memento.
    • Doing the same thing with this movie and just following one storyline at a time. They do a bit of that in the Star Wars Radio Drama. Mentioned: "Lost", "Arrested Development" (season 4).
      • Pete is calling for the ability to make (shareable) Spotify playlists but for streaming services.
        • We also would like the ability to shuffle and we miss the chapter titles like on the DVD. Mentioned: Qui-Gon's noble end.
  • Final thoughts on the Canto Bight subplot: If you're the kind of person that this bit of the movie ruins Star Wars for you, you've got to learn to move on.
  • Steele will ruin small bodies of water for us tomorrow. Plug for the 8-DAY-GREEDO hotline.

Meta Minute

  • 43:00 podcast episode length.
  • There's a great Millennium Falcon fan blog which includes all the different versions of the Incredible Cross Sections of the Falcon.


  • Steele I'm on the back of your fathier right now, buddy. Pete: That's what that was.
  • Pete: You know what's not disappointing? Green Chef.
  • Steele: Ultra-fund the Canto Bight Police.
  • Steele: (as George Lucas, leaning back in his chair) That's how you CGI, bad boy.
  • Steele: (taking umbrage) Let the fathier's roam!
  • Steele: I'm paying $11.95, let me ruin art.


Audio only

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